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Monday, September 19, 2016

Consciousness and Another Look at Competition

When you are in the win/lose paradigm, competition is present. And is that a good thing? Between watching the Olympics, all levels of football this week, sports channels, video games, politics, business news and my own self as I drive around town, I wondered. Friendly competition, hostile competition when is any of it good or out of balance? Family life of siblings and parents can be filled with competition as favoritism or to toughen you up that is never ending and sets the direction in our adult lives.

Maybe competition starts with survival of the fittest awareness. Testosterone levels can determine the win. Only the best survive and propagate. Big guy or the smartest guy or the big, smart guy gets the girl. Competition is full of judgments often arbitrary and personal bias. It is at its basis.

Then there is sportsmanship. Sportsmanship is important. It is how we get along with each other. Everyone deserves a turn, a chance to play, no matter how they play. Each deserves respect. What would it be like to give equal time, equal attention that supports enjoyment not accomplishment?

A television commentary followed a college game about a children's game somewhere and the panel was upset with the coach who presented to both children's team a trophy to every member, winners and losers alike. The panel was sort of horrified. What were we teaching our children if they didn't learn how to lose and the cost and how important a sense of failure was to learn early in life? Why strive to do your best if everybody gets credit? We are failing as good shepherds if we don't set them up for what Life will be like etc, etc. Do you feel the mindsets setting up?

How much is our business culture set up about competition and lack of resources and hoarding? How much of our political atmosphere is built around competition and not real issues? Religion is full of competition. Mine is better than yours. Mine is the only way.

Whether we are on a bike in a group or concepting something new we are challenging and often competing with only ourselves. The other is just to stir us on.

Considering how often results between first and second place is in milliseconds, does it matter? We want to be fair. Do we take it too far? When the stakes are high it is good to see athletes acknowledge that today I won. Tomorrow I might not as we are all playing at a similar level.

We want to celebrate the accomplishments and the remarkable.  We can also glorify them which leads to issues. Variety makes life interesting. What is gained by making someone feel bad for not meeting some arbitrary standard? We are individuals and all have merit on the curve. Or it would not be a curve. What if the guy who is forming the curve was valued as much as the guy at the top of the arc.

I was struck with appreciation when the opposing team brought flowers to lay down on the 50 yard line to share in the awareness of the loss of a player from the home team. It was a good game that followed full of history and passion and close to the very end. It felt good to witness on Facebook when a children'soccer team consoled the losing team in compassionate not overlord behavior.

Do we play with or do we pay against? You with me or against me? Good questions to check in about from within Heart Centered Awareness. Allow for play and see what shows up.

Many can be best in the world. Me being the best I can be really has nothing to do with you being the best you can be. What if it was okay to admit that you were lousy at something and you didn't care and did it anyway? Like singing and we all got excited to witness you enjoying yourself?

What if the paradigm was win/win?

Janet Barrett
janetb@janetandbeyond.com
www.janetandbeyond.com